Miraculous you call it babe
You ain't seen nothing yet
They've got Pepsi in the Andes
McDonalds in Tibet
Yosemite's been turned into
A golf course for the Japs
The Dead Sea is alive with rap
Between the Tigris and Euphrates
There's a leisure centre now
They've got all kinds of sports
They've got Bermuda shorts
They had sex in Pennsylvania
A Brazilian grew a tree
A doctor in Manhattan
Saved a dying man for free

It's a miracle
Another Miracle
By the grace of God Almighty
And the pressures of the marketplace
The human race has civilized itself
It's a miracle

We've got warehouses of butter
We've got oceans of wine
We've got famine when we need it
Got designer crime
We've got Mercedes
We've got Porsche
Ferrari and Rolls Royce
We've got choice
She said meet me
In the Garden of Gethsemene my dear
The Lord said Peter I can see
Your house from here
An honest (family) man
Finally reaped what he had sown
A farmer in Ohio has just repaid a loan

It's a miracle
By the grace of God Almighty
And the pressures of the marketplace
The human race has civilized itself
It's a miracle

We cower in our shelters
With our hands over our ears
Lloyd-Webber's awful stuff
» Andrew Lloyd Webber's awful stuff
Runs for years and years and years
An earthquake hits the theatre
But the operetta lingers
Then the piano lid comes down
And breaks his fucking fingers
It's a miracle

Man1: Sergeant, gimme the flashlight!
Sergeant: We'll only be left with nothing but that oil lamp!
Man1: You don't need it, I need all the help I can get out there!
Now let me have it!
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

*switch TV channel*

Woman: I've had a ball!
Woman: Oh! My eyes!